Whoever You Are Holding Me Now in Hand 

WHOEVER you are, holding me now in hand,
Without one thing, all will be useless,
I give you fair warning, before you attempt me 
 further,
I am not what you supposed, but far different.

Who is he that would become my follower?
Who would sign himself a candidate for my affections?

The way is suspicious—the result uncertain, perhaps 
 destructive;
You would have to give up all else—I alone would expect
 to be your God, sole and exclusive,
Your novitiate would even then be long and exhausting,
The whole past theory of your life, and all conformity 
 to the lives around you, would have to be abandoned;
Therefore release me now, before troubling yourself 
 any further—Let go your hand from my shoulders,
Put me down, and depart on your way.

Or else, by stealth, in some wood, for trial,
Or back of a rock, in the open air,
(For in any roof'd room of a house I emerge not—nor 
 in company,
And in libraries I lie as one dumb, a gawk, or unborn,
 or dead,)
But just possibly with you on a high hill—first watching lest any person,
 for miles around, approach unawares,
Or possibly with you sailing at sea, or on the beach of 
 the sea, or some quiet island,
Here to put your lips upon mine I permit you,
With the comrade's long-dwelling kiss, or the new 
 husband's kiss,
For I am the new husband, and I am the comrade.

Or, if you will, thrusting me beneath your clothing,
Where I may feel the throbs of your heart, or rest 
 upon your hip,
Carry me when you go forth over land or sea;
For thus, merely touching you, is enough—is best,
And thus, touching you, would I silently sleep and be 
 carried eternally.

But these leaves conning, you con at peril,
For these leaves, and me, you will not understand,
They will elude you at first, and still more afterward 
 —I will certainly elude you,
Even while you should think you had unquestionably 
 caught me, behold!
Already you see I have escaped from you.

For it is not for what I have put into it that I have 
 written this book,
Nor is it by reading it you will acquire it,
Nor do those know me best who admire me, and 
 vauntingly praise me,
Nor will the candidates for my love, (unless at most a 
 very few,) prove victorious,
Nor will my poems do good only—they will do just as 
 much evil, perhaps more;
For all is useless without that which you may guess at 
 many times and not hit—that which I hinted at;
Therefore release me, and depart on your way.